You are mandated to report. It's the law.
You are most likely a mandated reporter. Pharmacists are on the list in the laws of most states. When you see child abuse or neglect, you have to report it to stay legal. You may not have known that.
Around Christmas 1995, the chain drug store where I worked put ends of toys all over the store. There were two right near the pharmacy. One was a display of dolls.
I was working away one evening. Getting g an order together for a regular customer who worked for Child Protective Services. This was in Washington State and, as usual, this state employee had police powers.
All of a sudden, there was a huge fight. “I told you not to touch.” Slam, Bam, Bif. “How many times do I have to tell you?” Ka-Bam, Huh.”
“Oww, please, Mommy. Please don’t hit me. I’m sorry, Mommy.” This small five year old was pleading with her mother. “I won’t touch. I promise.”
These were no slight slaps. They were big hits with an open hand. The kid went to the floor and refused to get up and the mother lost it.”
She kicked her little girl. I was frozen. I wanted to do something, but what?
“You’re gonna learn.” Slap, Bam, Bif.
That was enough for my CPS patient. She stepped over, shoved her badge in the woman’s face and arrested her.
The five year old went to foster care awaiting the court’s judgment on the mother. There was no father in the house.
The DPS patient told me that I am a mandated reporter. Later, she sent me the law. I asked her if I was supposed to do something when a parent spanks a kid in the toy aisle.
“Legally yes, but a drug store is a different environment than a doctor’s office or an emergency room.” Her look told me that she trusted me to make the right choices.
I did, only once. I was living in Oak Harbor, Washington, the home of Naval Air Station Whidbey Island. The interesting twist is that the kid who was getting beaten was a close friend of my 12 year old daughter. She broke down one day and told my daughter what her Navy sailor step-father was doing to her. Christy told me. To be fully accurate, the mother and kids were Filipino. The step-father was pure white American.
The mother and the girl came in one day. They said hello. I was a good friend’s father. I saw the bruises on her legs where the shorts did not cover. Her neck had bruises like strangle-marks. I asked. The girl looked down to the floor. The mother said that she had fallen.
I called my DPS friend. She did not take action herself. She paid a visit to the sailor’s commanding officer. The entire family was in counseling three days a week, starting immediately.
That’s all I know. Angie was pissed off at Christy for telling me.
What would you do?
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JP, I guess that means I need to brush up on the law an find out what forms of abuse are considered reportable. Obviously, kicking a kid is abuse. But I see what I consider abuse day in and day out. The screaming child, who obviously needs something; whether it be food, a diaper change, a nap, or just some consistent discipline; being pushed around the store in a cart as the parent continues to shop, completely ignoring the child. I know it’s easier for the parents to tune out a tantrum, but it’s not so easy when a stranger has to listen to it. If I could just figure out a way to find out what the screaming is about, maybe some reporting could happen - “You haven’t fed anything to little Johnnie today? Maybe this CPS agent could whip up a little something for you”
I’m not a pharmacist, I’m an anthropologist.
I was abused as a kid. No one ever said anything, except for one er doctor that was so concerned that he had to do something, he added his own story to the truth, and his accusations were later considered unfounded. Please don’t try to ‘help’ the situation- it won’t.
Last year I went to the funeral of my friends 7 week old daughter, who was beaten to death by her father. The beating that killed her was not the first beating- just the worst, and far too much for her little body. She was in the PICU on life support for a week, and even though the funeral home had done the best job they could have after, she was covered with marks which were clearly from her father. The image of her in her casket still haunts me today.
Thank you JP for helping Angie and her family. You are a good man.
So, SOSP. Washington is serious about this stuff. I think that spanking is illegal, huh? My patient/friend at DPS said that it is easy for doctors. The environment is closed. A kid with suspicious bruises and they report. Around 1986, my wife and I had to head out to see my father who was dying. We left my 2 year old daughter with Grandma & Grandpa and AMOCICILLIN. My daughter was allergic and it manifested as erythema multiforme.
Grandma & Grandpa rushed Alicia to her pediatrician. If you have not seen erythema multiforme, it looks as if the sufferer had been beaten.
The pediatrician confessed to me later that she had never actually seen a kid with erythema multiforme. She was only inches away from calling DPS. She did not know my in-laws.
Now, you can’t get that focused at a drug store, a super market or a big box. My focus now is on people using pharmacy services. I cannot hang around the toy department. We would have to have a full-time “Mandatd Deputy” at Christmas time.
No-Brainer, if a marginal mother (Sorry, but I profile and SOSP, mygawd, I do not envy you) shows up with prescriptions for a child who looks beat up, I’ll downright interrogate that parent. I think you could tell if she was guilty.
JP, I am glad that you told. Child abuse stories have always made me sad, but it wasn’t until I became a mother that I felt deep grief in the depths of my soul at the mention of someone abusing a child.
There are not a lot of kids at my practice site, but the ones who are there are usually grouchy and unruly. Since we are an outpt pharm inside a hospital, the kids who are in our pharmacy have been staying in a boring waiting room for a long time and have had to walk a long way from the parking garage all the way through the hospital, etc. They and their parents are generally exhausted.
When I see a parent getting frustrated, I usually take them some stickers and just make light conversation about how my little ones get grouchy and bored at the doc’s office too. I’m certainly not preventing abuse, but I think I have prevented a few kids from getting yelled at our of sheer frustration.
I was another kid like that little girl in your pharmacy. I was 10 before I tried to make somebody listen. It didn’t work, and I ended up trying to kill myself a few years later instead.
Reporting is better than ignoring it; there’s a chance the kid will meet a CP agent that can help. He or she will still catch hell whether the agent shows up or not; but when you speak up, at least the kid gets a chance.
JP, from what I’ve heard, WA is pretty specific in it’s laws about corporal punishment. Spanking, in the traditional sense, isn’t illegal, but a friend had an experience in which the cops detailed the laws to her. Her teen son cussed at her one evening, and she slapped his face. He called 911, and the police showed up a short time later. They asked the son “Did she use an object to hit you? Was her hand open or closed - like a fist?” Then, they went on to say that hitting with an open hand is considered spanking, and is legal.
Personally, I find nothing wrong with spanking - but there is a fine line between a spanking and a beating. I can’t specify it in words, but like pornography, “I know it when I see it”